the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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