But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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