so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
