You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
