idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
