Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
false alarm, still single
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