its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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