If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
