He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
