I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
