would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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