In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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