i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize