great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
