It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
