And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Randomize
