I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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