cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
