Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
