i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
