the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
