Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
she told me i tasted like america
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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