I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
