if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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