Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
