I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize
