Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
