I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize