Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
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