mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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