You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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