Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
