Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
