I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
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