how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
