i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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