the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
