There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
