Apparently you make a good broom.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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