I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
