i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
