If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
