M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
When are your genitals available?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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