you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
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