Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
