Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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