pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
