look no pants
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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