Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
