dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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